The holidays are a great time of the year to reconnect with friends and family.  While they can be filled with fun and festivities, they can also be chalked full of stress and chaos.  Between seeing the in-laws and the financial strain, the stress can have really negative effects on our relationships.  The good thing is that there are ways to prevent your holiday season from turning your relationship blue.  Here are 5 ways you can stay happily connected throughout the holiday season and effectively holiday-proof your relationship.

1. Make a plan.

With the busy season upon us, it is a good idea to discuss the game plan for presents, travel, and any other logistical information relevant to holidays plans. This includes making an agreement on expenditures to help you both be on the same page. Planning ahead can relieve some anxiety and stress and make more room for time spent relaxing together.

2. Share the love.

Holiday planning and preparations can mean an increased workload for everyone.  Whether it’s buying gifts, attending holiday parties, or preparing to host people in your home.  It often equates to extra chores.  Have a conversation about what needs to be done and where you might need help or assistance from your partner.  Working as a team prevents frustration and resentment and allows for all to have a joyous time.

3. Handling family.

This time of year usually includes spending time with extended family.  Every family has it’s own unique dynamics and many have that awkward relative that likes to corner people for some heated debate after indulging in too much spiked eggnog.  Talk to your partner about your boundaries and what topics of conversation are off limits for you at the next event.  Establish some signals to indicate you are in need of a helpful buffer (i.e. code-word, hand signal) and create some methods for helping each other out those uncomfortable conversations.  Develop your own personal exit strategies for topics that can be triggering or upsetting.  Having a conversation about how to handle family will help prevent miscommunication and help you to feel more relaxed at family get-togethers.

4. Set your own traditions.

It’s easy to get lost in all of the obligations around this time of year and it can be hard to find time to share the moment with your partner. Find an activity or event that the two of you can bond over outside of the more traditional seasonal activities. For example, you can attend a holiday jazz concert for a date night, open presents from the two of you after the kids go to bed, sneak away for a bit to drive around the block and look at Christmas lights, or share a favorite memory you had with your partner from from the last year over a cup of hot chocolate.  Take time to create your own traditions as a couple.

5. Count your blessings

‘Tis the season to share gratitude and reflect on the past year.  But how do you do this with your partner? Take the time to share what you are grateful for in your relationship and let your partner know the things they do that you appreciate. Have a conversation about highlights of the past year and discuss some relationship goals you’d like to accomplish in the next year.

What are your holiday traditions as a couple?  How do you find the time to celebrate the season together?  We’d love to hear your ideas in the comment section below!